{{teletype We see an outhouse and hear the sound of a toilet flushing. Out steps SHREK, an ogre, who tugs at his underwear and shakes his foot of the page still stuck to his shoe. He looks lovingly at the swamp he calls home, and goes about his daily routine. This includes taking a mud shower, brushing his teeth with bugs, bathing in a muddy pond, gathering giant slugs for dinner, and painting a warning sign.
In a nearby village, an angry mob gather up to go after Shrek. At night they gather their torches and pitchforks and enter the swamp, trampling over Shrek's warning signs. Shrek sees them after investigating the commotion, rolling his eyes. The villagers stop outside Shrek's home, unaware that Shrek is sneaking up behind them.
NIGHT - NEAR SHREK'S HOME
VILLAGER 1: Think it's in there?
VILLAGER 2: All right. Let's get it!
VILLAGER 1: Whoa. Hold on. Do you know what that thing can do to you?
VILLAGER 3: Yeah, it'll grind your bones for its bread.
Shrek chuckles, revealing himself to be standing behind the mob.
SHREK: Yes, well, actually, that would be a giant.}}